14 June 2013
20 April 2013
15 April 2013
12 April 2013
爱与不爱
多久了，多久没回来这了。两年。我刚刚还以想试试的心态 log in 这里。因为我真的忘了用户名字和密码，误打误撞让我进来了。
看回以前 post 的一些心情日记，真后悔当初怎么没保留早期的。才发现，原来我从2007年已开始拥有它了。
其实，带我回到这的人是我在 USM 的学长。因为好奇想看看他的故事，所以自己慢慢去 google search 了一下。 不简单，还真的让我这个偷鸡摸狗的人给找到了。
他的过去，他经历的，到底有多少我不知道的。很好奇他的过去。 看起来他很喜欢写作，还会自己写小说。 可是当我在看着的当儿，我在心里想，有些的故事，情节，会不会就是切切实实地发生过？ 是因为曾经受过伤害而不敢再爱了吗？ 到底是一个怎样的伤害能让你对爱情没信心了呢？ 我很想知道。 其实，我们都很渴望爱情，希望能爱和被爱。
两个星期从槟城回来后，你就不间断地出现在我脑海里。 究竟是为什么呢？ 有好几天都都处在伤心的状态，因为你竟然 remove 了我 tag 你的相片。 是我多此一举了吗？你厌烦我这样做？还是学长间接地表示什么？ 我希望那只是朋友所说的，只是不喜欢相片而已。可是我的确有被伤到。 告诉自己，还是算了吧。顺其自然，有缘的话我们就在一起。 可是，这样的事情也不是第一次发生在我身上了。我渐渐开始怀疑自己的感觉，有时候会有一厢情愿的感觉。 明明就还不知道对方的想法，自己却先坠了下去。 所以我已不知道何时该把握，争取，何时只是个过客了。 我很渴望爱情的到来。我明白它不会事先向我预告，我也不会知道我的那个他何时出现。
不过我相信，我会幸福的。
其实，带我回到这的人是我在 USM 的学长。因为好奇想看看他的故事，所以自己慢慢去 google search 了一下。 不简单，还真的让我这个偷鸡摸狗的人给找到了。
他的过去，他经历的，到底有多少我不知道的。很好奇他的过去。 看起来他很喜欢写作，还会自己写小说。 可是当我在看着的当儿，我在心里想，有些的故事，情节，会不会就是切切实实地发生过？ 是因为曾经受过伤害而不敢再爱了吗？ 到底是一个怎样的伤害能让你对爱情没信心了呢？ 我很想知道。 其实，我们都很渴望爱情，希望能爱和被爱。
两个星期从槟城回来后，你就不间断地出现在我脑海里。 究竟是为什么呢？ 有好几天都都处在伤心的状态，因为你竟然 remove 了我 tag 你的相片。 是我多此一举了吗？你厌烦我这样做？还是学长间接地表示什么？ 我希望那只是朋友所说的，只是不喜欢相片而已。可是我的确有被伤到。 告诉自己，还是算了吧。顺其自然，有缘的话我们就在一起。 可是，这样的事情也不是第一次发生在我身上了。我渐渐开始怀疑自己的感觉，有时候会有一厢情愿的感觉。 明明就还不知道对方的想法，自己却先坠了下去。 所以我已不知道何时该把握，争取，何时只是个过客了。 我很渴望爱情的到来。我明白它不会事先向我预告，我也不会知道我的那个他何时出现。
不过我相信，我会幸福的。
7 June 2011
6 October 2010
25 September 2010
I'm back!
I miss here lotsss.
it has been a place where I can share everything and tell anything without considering.
haha. without considering? haha. I actually haven't reach it yet. I'm looking forward in the future! =)
and what I want to post today are things that already happened few weeks or months ago.
first, college.
it's really kind of stupid thing that I thought both of us have the feel to each other. it's really stupid man!! I shouldn't make any expectation on you before knowing you well.
and now, after I've been gone through "something" in this few weeks, I've just perceived that it's not the feeling of like or love.
I know, I felt so helpless and depressed at that time. perhaps I couldn't get well for the changes around me. he is a really nice person and treat other as well too. so, accidentally I put the wrong feeling on this friend. I realised, I just want someone to accompany and always be my side and support me when I need. I thought he is the one who can bring me out from the past. silly.
it's a good thing for me that I've discovered my silliness now. finally. finally after the incident which I wanted to write the next.
so now, I just want to be friends with him. he is a really good friend to know! really. I should protect our friendship from all the rumours. it shouldn't be rumour anymore, be normal from now on. I want to appreciate this friend as well as I could in the future!
friends are always the best.
second, Jeffrey's farewell party night.
Jeff and Nian are now in Russia where in the other pole of Earth.
I'm gonna miss both of you sooo much! and please do take care of yourself k.
and Jeff! remember what you said, focus and put effort on study first. smile always!
and Nian! remember our memories that can cheer you up in there and don't eat too much ya. you might gain weight. smile always!
yes. the night.
I met those I miss lots, my wer, my friends. I had had fun and enjoyed. and I finally took a picture with Jeff for the first time. I like the pic soo much. appreciate it. then, we stayed overnight at Jeff's house and had some alcohol. Zhen brought a bottle of Vodka and it really killed me. I'd drunk.
drunk. first time.
I think I were in a half-conscious condition and I could still remember a little on what I did.
I remember I cried like hell. tears burst. totally collapsed. because of someone who always leave me just like that and doesn't even confront the things with me. I hated you didn't do anything. I hated the way you solve things. I hated you like flirting. yes. I hated. that's way I collapsed in front of my friends. it's tortureous. really. realised that I haven't completely put it down. I don't wish to. it seems like a heavy stone that bind me so tight. I don't like it's still hovering in my mind.
tell you, I want to get rid of this. WE ARE MORE SUITABLE TO BE FRIEND. forever and it will never beyond it. you always promise things easily but you don't even accomplish each of them. please change your attitude and behave well. han
third, myself.
I've got lotsssssss of thing have to do but I'm still doing some less-important stuff here.
book review presentation for GP subject will be on Monday. and I still haven't prepared anything yet. really have lotss of thing I should be complete. I chose a novel called FALLEN. it's really thick man but really nice! luckily I've finished reading it on time. but i'm now doing stupid thing, I intended to read it all again to go in more deeper. do I have enough time to complete all the things?! =( bless, pray and wish me luck please. =( please wish me. I'm really nervous about the presentation. reason - haven't well-prepared it yet!
and study. the final test is just left a month more. I got lotssssss of thing from different subjects have to study!!! I have lack of time but I can still use the time for sleeping and do other things. hey ching, please. please arrange your time well. it's for the one last chance for this year. make a good result! I want to see your improvements in all the subjects!
make a promise. after the presentation on monday, I WILL START OF DOING REVISION AND STUDY AS WELL.
this month will be a busy month for me.
has no enough time for me to think about other things now but only study! jiayou!
look forward and keep going.
putttttttttt moreeeeee effortttttttt!!!
diligence will pay off! =)
love, ching
it has been a place where I can share everything and tell anything without considering.
haha. without considering? haha. I actually haven't reach it yet. I'm looking forward in the future! =)
and what I want to post today are things that already happened few weeks or months ago.
first, college.
it's really kind of stupid thing that I thought both of us have the feel to each other. it's really stupid man!! I shouldn't make any expectation on you before knowing you well.
and now, after I've been gone through "something" in this few weeks, I've just perceived that it's not the feeling of like or love.
I know, I felt so helpless and depressed at that time. perhaps I couldn't get well for the changes around me. he is a really nice person and treat other as well too. so, accidentally I put the wrong feeling on this friend. I realised, I just want someone to accompany and always be my side and support me when I need. I thought he is the one who can bring me out from the past. silly.
it's a good thing for me that I've discovered my silliness now. finally. finally after the incident which I wanted to write the next.
so now, I just want to be friends with him. he is a really good friend to know! really. I should protect our friendship from all the rumours. it shouldn't be rumour anymore, be normal from now on. I want to appreciate this friend as well as I could in the future!
friends are always the best.
second, Jeffrey's farewell party night.
Jeff and Nian are now in Russia where in the other pole of Earth.
I'm gonna miss both of you sooo much! and please do take care of yourself k.
and Jeff! remember what you said, focus and put effort on study first. smile always!
and Nian! remember our memories that can cheer you up in there and don't eat too much ya. you might gain weight. smile always!
yes. the night.
I met those I miss lots, my wer, my friends. I had had fun and enjoyed. and I finally took a picture with Jeff for the first time. I like the pic soo much. appreciate it. then, we stayed overnight at Jeff's house and had some alcohol. Zhen brought a bottle of Vodka and it really killed me. I'd drunk.
drunk. first time.
I think I were in a half-conscious condition and I could still remember a little on what I did.
I remember I cried like hell. tears burst. totally collapsed. because of someone who always leave me just like that and doesn't even confront the things with me. I hated you didn't do anything. I hated the way you solve things. I hated you like flirting. yes. I hated. that's way I collapsed in front of my friends. it's tortureous. really. realised that I haven't completely put it down. I don't wish to. it seems like a heavy stone that bind me so tight. I don't like it's still hovering in my mind.
tell you, I want to get rid of this. WE ARE MORE SUITABLE TO BE FRIEND. forever and it will never beyond it. you always promise things easily but you don't even accomplish each of them. please change your attitude and behave well. han
third, myself.
I've got lotsssssss of thing have to do but I'm still doing some less-important stuff here.
book review presentation for GP subject will be on Monday. and I still haven't prepared anything yet. really have lotss of thing I should be complete. I chose a novel called FALLEN. it's really thick man but really nice! luckily I've finished reading it on time. but i'm now doing stupid thing, I intended to read it all again to go in more deeper. do I have enough time to complete all the things?! =( bless, pray and wish me luck please. =( please wish me. I'm really nervous about the presentation. reason - haven't well-prepared it yet!
and study. the final test is just left a month more. I got lotssssss of thing from different subjects have to study!!! I have lack of time but I can still use the time for sleeping and do other things. hey ching, please. please arrange your time well. it's for the one last chance for this year. make a good result! I want to see your improvements in all the subjects!
make a promise. after the presentation on monday, I WILL START OF DOING REVISION AND STUDY AS WELL.
this month will be a busy month for me.
has no enough time for me to think about other things now but only study! jiayou!
look forward and keep going.
putttttttttt moreeeeee effortttttttt!!!
diligence will pay off! =)
love, ching
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